It is not often I find myself so busy that I do not have time to sit down and write something. Thus, I took a class to force me to write this semester. Now, I have no excuse for when I'm crazy and overly-emotional (that's what happens when I write... it gets all pent up and then I write and everything turns rosy again like magic). Why, you ask? Well, I'm getting married. But everyone already knows that because I talk about it like it's the second coming of Jesus.
Anyway, other reasons I have not had time to write? Who knows, I suppose I tend to get caught up in life and other things when I should just be writing about it.
A little bit of is getting discouraged, as well.
I'm concerned with my audience. Yes! You, my audience.
See, I've had my blog since June. And I know that I'm making a difference. In less than 8 months, I've had almost 5,000 views on my blog...all. over. the. world. People in KENYA read my blog. 5,000 times people have clicked the link to victoriagracewrites.blogspot.com and they keep clickin' because they just like what I have to say. Or, if they don't like it, they continue to read because they enjoy laughing at what a mess my life is. But my concern is with my audience and their love for my blog. You guys LOVE my blog. If you didn't, you wouldn't be reading it right now.
So after months of writing about Jesus and how I like to drink wine and how I'm flying-to-Maryland-getting-engaged-getting-married (that might as well have been one post because it all happened so fast) and how I really, really love myself, WHY DOES EVERYONE TELL ME I SHOULD WRITE A BOOK, but they won't share my blog? Why do multiple people, every single day, say "I can't wait to read your book" but you read my blog and then click the red X in the corner without a second thought? I write for myself, as I should, and I am not too sure I care about what others think. But I don't publish it on my blog solely for my own satisfaction. My writing, ever personal and a spiritual record of my growth, is for you. Yes, you: my best friends who I know read this blog but never say a word to me about it, ask me how it's going or even bother to comment and say "I'm proud to be your friend". For the guy who told me with anger two months ago to "go preach on my blog". (This one, and my next project? For you, buddy...because that was proof you are apart of the 5,000 clicks.) I write and publish my heart and soul for the girls who don't have enough self-esteem to write their own blog, for the guys who need to know how to win over a girl, for the women who surround me every day but barely have enough strength to get out of bed every morning.
I write my heart out for the girls who walk up to me at parties and ask me about my relationship with Jesus, beer in hand and all.
I write my heart out for the girls who commented on Made With Purpose and told me they cried while they read it and it made them realize they are perfect just the way they are.
I write my heart out for the man who gave his heart to me because he found my heart, right here on this blog.
I write my heart out for every person who has never told me they read my blog but it changed a little piece of their heart anyway.
I write my heart out for my unborn children, because I want to leave something behind that causes them to beam with pride.
I write my heart out for broken people everywhere, like the person who found this blog searching the term "deciding to spend New Years Eve alone". For you, I hope you found what you were looking for here.
One of the best tips I've ever received from educating myself on how to become noticed is to know your audience. I know the majority of you, but I don't know what you're looking for. The advice doesn't say, "recognize your audience by their Facebook profile picture". It says know your audience and what they want to hear. If no one is speaking, I can't hear you.
When I began this blog, it was because people wanted more. They wanted to read more of my short stories, more of my life journey, more of my relationship with God and the times He frustrates me and delights in my the most. It takes a lot of strength to put my heart out there, but knowing I'm making a difference in one person makes it completely worth it.
Do you still want more? Do you like what you see? Tell me about your favorite blog, what you like and dislike about this blog, and what you want more of. Please, I can't do it without you.
This is exactly what I like about your blog - posts like this. They're personal, they're transparent, they're vulnerable. You don't pretend like the sun shines when you wake up, and you don't pretend that you've got it all figured out. You find beauty in the middle of whatever it is you're waking up to every morning, and you're sharing it with us the way you encounter it. Your posts are a strange mix of peacefully frantic, and I can imagine that your world looks somewhat similar. I think I enjoy your writing style because I feel like it's a bit similar to mine - I can sometimes read them in my own voice. It's a little weird.
ReplyDeleteI think I loved this post because of all those things, and because it's a sentiment I find myself echoing. It's really easy to get discouraged (in my experience) when you're putting your heart on your sleeve and writing because you want to and because you hope that the words you pour on the page can find their way into someone's heart and someone's circumstances. It's easy to get discouraged when you feel like people may not care, may not read, or may not understand that you're genuinely passionate about people coming across what you're writing and it making a difference. I hit lulls of "what's the point, I might as well just keep a private journal" sometimes, but then I'm reminded that God works in ways beyond my understanding. He's shared my experiences with people around the world, and he's shared yours as well. We need people to help keep us going because, it's true, without the audience there is no blog. But I'm often encouraged by the ways I've seen God use things I've written in the lives of others.
Keep writing your heart out !
Thank you. I think you just made this whole entire thing worth it.
DeleteAnd yes, my world is quite like you described... peacefully frantic!
Thanks for reminding me that God works in frustrating and ultimately mysterious ways for the better.
I understand the frustration, and you're very welcome.
DeleteHeard an awesome message on mustard-seed faith a week ago and decided to put my writing in God's hands as the thing I'm going to have faith in this year. I want him to use my writing to reach people for his glory. You should see some of the ridiculous things I've come across since I started on that prayer.
In other news, you want mysterious ways? Someone in the Marshall Islands just checked out my blog. Pardon my ignorance, but where the heck are the Marshall Islands? That click was definitely not the work of my hands.
God gave you the gift and he's certainly going to use it :) .
Vicki,
ReplyDeleteI read your blog because I first saw your links from Twitter and I knew from being your AGD sister that you were a very driven, outspoken, talented and caring person; also a fabulous writer.
We were never really friends as I was "old" you were "young" and well, I was very busy my last year in the chapter...I always felt kind of left out in the last year of my membership...by my own fault of course...and somehow you were always nice to my face and had great ideas to contribute at meeting and did what you could to be very involved as a new member. I have and had respect for you and knew you were a great person who would do great things to help anyone she could.
I love reading about your whirlwind romance, your ideas on God (I am not religious as of now...but I love to see opinions and views of others and learn as much as I can), I appreciate how you put your heart out on the web for anyone to read. You are so honest and to the point. I feel that I know you better from reading your blog than being your sister. I feel so lucky that I can see what a fabulous and outstanding person you are becoming!!!!
I think what you write is what you should continue to publish. Write about God in your life, your wedding, your frustrations of planning your future with someone else, your hopes and dreams. I hate to read...so it should mean something that your writing gives me enjoyable material to read. I do not read to see if you fail or where you come up short, I read because I not only care about you through ritual and letters, but because you are a person and you are a great person.
I hope that you keep writing (when you can...you're so busy!) and that you write what is on your mind and what needs to come out!!
Good luck with: school, blogging, planning a wedding, keeping up on your fairytale relationship, and surviving everyday life!
Best wishes to you! AND I am very proud of you and very proud to say that you are my sister. You are going to go far in life!
Loyally,
Kaitlin (Kato)
I think you should keep writing so you can empty your soul once in a while. There are too many young women to help and too many people to reach for you to stop now. Besides, your family is very proud of you. You are a strong woman and represent all of the women in your family very well. It's in your genes to write, tell stories, touch people, and make smiles. Keep it up.
ReplyDeleteYour writing gives people things to ponder. It is an amazing way for you to share your thoughts on the world. The way you write brings your stories to life. I love how you write about your every day experiences. Have you thought about writing more about your memories & important or fun moments from your youth? Help your readers learn where you are coming from & how those experiences made you the amazing woman you are today.
ReplyDelete